Thursday, March 15
How selfish am I?
Once in a while, I work for my brother. That means I spend a whole day (usually saturday) helping him in his business. What do I get? A warm "Thank you". And sometimes it's not even that warm. And this warmth tends to evaporate so fast, that after a few days, he doesn't seem to remember I did something for him. So when I give him a call, he sounds irritated, he's busy, you see. He is a charming man. He's got the right look (tall, blonde, nice smile) and believe me, he'd be the best public relations, but when it comes to family, I have the feeling family for him is there to be used. I know I'll spend the 24th this month and some day in april working for him. I don't want to do it anymore. I suggested some time ago that he could give me some money. I can't remember what he said, but the word money has never been pronounced again. Am I being selfish?? I'm writing this because this trip proved to me once more how different we are. And I'm mad at him. And I guess mad at me too. He would never spend a day of his life helping me, I'm absolutely certain of that. So why do I keep on doing it?
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8 comments:
Does he ask you to help him, or do you just volunteer?
If you just volunteer, I'd wait until he asks why you haven't been by lately.
But if he calls you every so often and asks you to donate your time, I'd just say that I couldn't really get away right now. Let him do that a few times, and maybe he'll get the message.
It doesn't sound as though your are selfish, maybe a bit fed up. It sounds more like you are tired of being used. What is the reason your should further his goals at the expense of your time? Time is money, and he is taking your time.
If he wants you to work in his business, he needs to declare your free labor as income on his 1120.
Additionally, it sound like your efforts are not appreciated by him.
WM
Well, it started kind of like James says. He'd ask me if I didn't mind helping him "just this time", and I said "no problem, I actually like it". Then it became some kind of a routine. He'd assume I like it, therefore, I'd want to do it for free. No need to be so grateful, right? But as WM says, I'm fed up. I just feel used, not appreciated. I'm angry. But my relationship with my brother has never been easy!
I can see why your relationship is strained. Is your brother older or younger than you?
I just read your question about the email with fake headlines on my site. As I said there, I didn't find an email from you on either of the ones you might know of.
Please send them again. I will diligently look for it.
No, you're not being selfish.
James, he's 8 years older than me. Buffalo, I guess I am selfish at some point, but who isn't?
Btw, I decided to change my blog title. I started in my language, but since most of the blogs I visit are in English, I thought I could try... and my Catalan title didn't make much sense.
I think it is often the case when an older sibling takes advantage of a younger one.
I kind of liked the old name, probably because I didn't know how to pronounce it (and I once asked you to help me with that, and you didn't!!) and have no idea what it means.
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