Flying with children

We tend to avoid going through security instructions when flying. we see the leaflet, we kind of hide it someplace. We're not going to need it, right? Bad things only happen to other people, everybody knows that. But, on our trip to Austria, security instructions on the plane were posted literally on the back of the seat right in front of us. No hiding, no avoiding. And, we had two curious kids sitting with us.

-Mom, why is this man crawling like a baby?
-mmm... He probably lost something on the floor, he's trying to find it...

-Why does he have a mask?
-mmm... in case he feels sick
-Why would he feel sick? I never wear a mask when I feel sick



-What's this slide? Are we going to use it?
-No, it's just in case the plane has to land on water
-Oh, planes can land on water?
-Yes... (bullshit)
-Will we land on water?
I hope NOT.
-Mom, the woman on the slide has no shoes on.
-Really?
-Yes, why?
-Because shoe heels could pierce the slide



-But... why not glasses?
-mmm.... she'll hurt herself if she uses the slide with glasses on.
-But the earrings??
.....
-And what's the man doing?
-Just resting sweety.



-Why are the clouds beneath us?
Don't remind me, please, humans are not meant to fly, otherwise we'd have developed feathers by now. It's like having a fish learn how to drive!!!

When she's tired of security instructions she walks to the front part of the plane and comes back with a look of surprise:
-Mom!
-What happened?
-Nobody is driving this plane!!